On Call

So I'm rambling a little, because I'm stressed out again. Work, of course. There is a phone call I hate, above all others, that I just got. This call NEVER occurs during regular business hours. It goes like this:
- Hello, this is Dr. Blah. How can I help you?
- My name is Ms/Mr X. I have a puppy. It has never been to a vet because I cannot afford/never got to getting its shots. It is now throwing up and won't eat and having diarrhea. It looks sick. You need to see it now.
- Ok, I agree that this is a bad situation that requires attention. I am obligated to let you know that it will cost a minimum of $X for me to see your puppy on emergency tonight, and may be higher depending on what is actually causing his illness.
- Can I make a payment plan?

Here's the thing: I'm a veterinarian, not a banker. I don't make loans; I don't have the financial backing to support paying for my salary and supplies until you can pay me back (if ever). I don't have the support of the federal government to subsidize your pet's care (unlike human hospitals). And yet, if I don't take your pet in tonight, I will feel horrible, because I know that depending on what the actual diagnosis is, I am condemning your pet. There is literally NO answer to this situation that does not make me the worst person in the world. And this happens far too often for me to say, "You know what? Maybe this person is just down on his/her luck. Maybe this is just temporary." This happens at least twice on a weekend on-call. I don't know if people realize, but all it is is guilt transfer. You feel guilty, because you own a pet you cannot take care of, so you call me, and then it's my fault. Even though it's not my pet; even though I've offered to help you get Care Credit; even though if I see you, and all the pets like you, I will soon not be able to afford to take care of anyone.

Sigh. On a more positive note, I went to a conference in San Diego last week. It's required by law that vets have to doing "continuing education" every year by going to these things. It was actually really great to remember all the things I love about medicine. And, since I was on my own, it was nice to walk through the city and not have to worry about my son running out into the street or slowing down for the husband. Although it was lonely; I'm not used to finding restaurants to eat at on my own and ended up eating a lot of take out in the hotel room. Boo. Will have to do better next time.

And if you happen to be in San Diego, go to Extraordinary Desserts. Not just for dessert; they have great sandwiches, wine, and REAL tea. And the desserts will blow your freakin' mind. Mmmmmm.